YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM ONTARIO WHEN...

* Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.
* "Vacation" means going to Barrie/area for the weekend. <-- NOWAY XD
* You measure distance in hours.
* You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day. <-- WE DO TOO
* Your grandparents drive at 65 mph through 13 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching. <-- HECK YES
* You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
* There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the Canadian Tire store at any given time.
* You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit. <-- NOOO XD
* Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
* You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, construction. <-- FUCK YES MAN
* You know several people who have hit deer more than once.
* You use a down comforter in the summer. <-- NO WAY.
* You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
* You have enough French vocabulary to get by some of the day in Ottawa without them thinking that you're a completly incapable American.

Things Canadians are Proud Of

* Crispy Crunch.
* Coffee Crisp.
* The footballs and fields are bigger, and we have one less Down.
* Lacrosse is Canadian.
* Hockey is Canadian.
* Basketball is Canadian.
* The biggest flags ever seen/flown at any Olympics were Canadian... The second time it was smuggled in because they made a rule against it cause of the first time.
* Mr. Dress-up can kick Mr. Rogers ass.
* Much Music kicks MTV's ass.
* Maple syrup kicks Mrs. Butterworths ass (...don't know about Aunt Jemima though).
* Tim Horton's kicks Dunkin Donuts ass.
* Waaaay better beer commercials/contests and beer company give a ways. Example: the Molson Canadian House Party...where you get to keep the house. Trashed or not.
* In the war of 1812, we pushed the Americans so far back... passed their 'White House', burned it...and most of Washington. We got bored because they ran away so we came home and partied. Go figure.
* Canada has the largest French population that never surrendered to Germany.
* The largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war.
* The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing... but showed up just in time to get caught.
* We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.
* The Hudson's Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earths surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.
* The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes.
* We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.
* The Canadian Civil War was a bar fight that lasted a little over an hour.
* We don't marry our kin-folk.
* We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers, the long distance and short wave radios that save countless lives each year. Oh yeah...and the handles on beer cases big enough to fit your hands with mitts on.
* We can hum the tune to 'Definition'.
* We all know that a scale that measures boiling water at 212 degrees and freezes at 32 is asinine.
* We've ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it.
* We can out drink Americans in a heart beat!!
* Our elections take only one day.

You have been on Speaker's Corner. Bonus points if they edited out your carefully prepared rant against the Harris government. <-- I KNOW THAT SHOWWWW. 8D

You know the French equivalents of "free", "prize" and "no sugar added", thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal packaging. <-- YES.

You can sing "O' Canada" in French and actually know what the words mean. <-- YES.

You can do the hand actions to Sharon, Lois and Bram's "Skin-a-marinki-dinki-do". <-- ... OH MY GOD I CAN.

You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling nauseous. <-- YESSSS♥

You know the ingredients for poutine. <-- I DO AND I LOVE IT.

You find it difficult to explain "milk in a bag" to non-Canadians, and even more difficult to describe the "snippy-thing" used on bag corners. (Bonus points if your collected snippy-things are stuck to your fridge.) <-- I SHOWED YOU PEOPLE LOL

You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK" <-- HOMOGENIZED MILK XD

You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars. <-- YES.

You drink Pop, not Soda. <-- YES.

You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway <-- IT IS A FISH.

You brag to Americans: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion & more, are Canadians. <-- JIM CARREY FTW.

You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed" <-- HELL YES

You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day. <-- IT IS.

You call it a BUN not a "Roll" <-- YES

You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan" <-- SASKATOON, TOO. BONUS. 8U

Its called a WASHROOM not a lavatory or powder room or rest room. <-- /YES/.

You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade. <-- YES

You understand the Labatt Blue commercials. <-- YES.

You automatically read 'Z' as 'Zed' and don't give a damn that it doesn't rhyme with "now I know my abcs". <-- OH HELL YEAH. XD

IS POUTINE THAT SHITTY STUFF WITH FRENCH FRIES AND CHEESE AND STUFF?

POUTINE IS GREAT 8U

Much Music kicks MTV's ass.

but then again, what doesn't

You drink Pop, not Soda.

i actually thought that was just an alabama thing o3o;

You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.

i have never uttered the phrase "candy bar"

You call it a BUN not a "Roll"

i actually use both words